I have no problem with this understanding of the marriage as I believe it completely aligns itself with what the torah teaches in Deut. 20:7 and 22:22-23. There is a difference between the wife of a man, and a damsel betrothed to a man. The difference would be that the latter hasn’t had sex with her husband and is still living with her father. What you’ve written here about the Israelite marriage process completely corroborates this understanding.
Absolutely. This is normally the way it works, I just meant to point out that it doesn't have to work hat way. A man and woman can legally have sex prior to living together if they are betrothed.
You say that my assessment is incorrect, but you just explained the Israelite marriage process above which teaches that there is a period between’s the father’s permission and the marriage or wedding feast. I agree that there is no betrothal without the father’s permission, but how does that disprove what I wrote?
(1) The Father gives the permission
(2) This means that the man and woman are betrothed
(3) The man leaves to prepare a home for the two of them and future children, thus the woman stays with her father and does not have sex with her husband.
(4) When the man returns the wedding or wedding feast takes place and then the marriage is consummated.
This is not entirely accurate. The "wedding feast" takes place AFTER the marriage is consummated. It is a celebration of a finalized marriage. You skipped a step.
(1) The father gives permission
(2) Man and woman are betrothed
(3) The man leaves to prepare a home, woman stays with father until he returns and SHOULD not have sex before leaving fathers house.
(4) When the man returns, he "takes" her to the newly prepared home where consummation of the marriage takes place,
(5) Couple returns again with blood sheet to prove consummation had occurred and THEN there is a "wedding feast".
The wedding feast is a celebration that the marriage has been sealed. This is also precisely the reason that sex before the woman being "taken" is a problem. It makes it look as though the woman is not a virgin at the time she moves in with the man, which is the basis for ridicule.
I agree. The father has already given permission, but the marriage is not complete until the couple is living together and has consummated the marriage with sex.
Socially, not "legally". Legally the marriage is complete once the contract is done, they are MARRIED!
[quote]If two people had sex before the woman moved in under the husband’s roof in that day, yes, they may have been ridiculed. The same thing happens in the “church worldâ€